Furious Fiction – July 2021

The brief of the AWC Furious Fiction—July 2021 short story competition was as follows:

  • Each story had to take place at some kind of contest.
  • Each story had to include a character who forgets something.
  • Each story had to include the words PRESS, FLING and GROUND. (Longer variations were accepted as long as original spelling was retained.)



I’m at the home stretch and my plan so far is working.

If I poison too many dishes it would be too obvious that someone is cheating, so I’ve had to be creative in this year’s Country Cooking Contest. Some dishes I spiked with MSG (which is banned), I’ve switched out spice bottles, sugar for salt and vice versa, measuring cups for cups that are a few mLs larger than they’re supposed to be…I could go on.

The Country Association have upped the ante, or at least the marketing of the Contest, by having a large press pack attend. This means I’ve had to be sneakier this year. So far so good. I’ve been looking around before switching things out or flinging things to the ground so they’re out of sight.

I’m in the final two with Julie McSimon, last year’s winner, my sabotage with her has to be big and perfect, especially as she’s been so smug and determined to win all day. Ipecac is my weapon of choice – simple, yet effective.

As Julie bent over to get another ingredient for her triple-chocolate cake, I bent over my desk to get my secret weapon of sabotage. The bottle of ipecac at the bottom of my bag…. which isn’t here.

Why isn’t it here? My car keys, house keys, wallet, cleaning gear are here…. oh crap! I’ve left it in the bathroom at home! Crap!

I guess I have no choice but to try and win fair and square. Damn it!


This story was partially inspired by this scene in The Simpsons – Season 16, Episode 2 (All’s Fair in Oven War).

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s